


Forms

by taztaas (manala)



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Crack, Fluff, Gen, Humor, M/M, Non-Chronological, One Shot Collection, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-28
Updated: 2018-03-30
Packaged: 2019-02-22 17:26:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13171713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/manala/pseuds/taztaas
Summary: What if Kravitz has other forms besides handsome and skeleton? This started as a Kravitz headcanon exploration but ended up being Taakitz fluff. My (tumblr) Magnum Opus!Updates sporadically, if at all.





	1. Giant Raven

The large wall-wide window of Taako’s Goldcliff penthouse apartment was shattered when something huge and feathered barreled through it, crashing into furniture and sending pieces of glass everywhere. Taako ducked behind the kitchen island with a curse, instinctively pulling Angus down with him.

Angus dared a peek around the counter to see what had happened. He stared, eyes wide.

In what used to be Taako’s living room, a huge, monstrous bird rose to its three feet with a bestial screech. Dark, almost black blood and loose feathers were pouring off the creature and into the floor. The bird spread its huge wings, knocking off light fixtures, such as Taako’s custom-made chandelier from the ceiling and making most of Taako’s recipe bookshelves topple onto the floor.

Angus swallowed audibly, his mouth suddenly dry. The bird folded its wings and turned to stare at Taako and Angus’ hiding spot. Three blood red eyes met Angus’ gaze and the boy froze, some primal fear making him unable to move as the eldritch creature stared him down.

“Damn, that smarts,” Taako muttered somewhere behind Angus. Apparently, he had hit himself on something in his haste to duck and cover.

“S- Sir! There’s some kind of demonic raven-”

“Huh?” Taako said, coming up beside Angus and setting a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “Oh yeah, take it easy Ango, it’s just Kravitz.”

“Kravitz?!” Angus squeaked, finally turning his eyes away from the creature to give Taako an incredulous stare.

“Yeah homie, an aspect of the RQ and all that? The boy’s got many forms. Haven’t seen this one much though.”

“Umm… Taako, sir!” Angus said and gave a sidelong glance at Kravitz who casually coughed up some humanoid (probably necromancer) bones and spat them in the corner of the living room. “He’s… bleeding. Kind of a lot.”

“Hmm, yeah. He can’t be healed tho, being undead and all. Gotta wait until he regenerates on his own.”

Angus considered Taako’s words, and they made sense, he supposed.

“Why is he still… a bird?” Angus asked with a small frown.

“Doesn’t have enough energy to change forms right now bubbeleh. Needs to rest a bit.”

In the background, Kravitz cawed and shook himself, sending more feathers flying. Taako stood up, dusted off his clothes and walked over to his husband.

“Hey baby,” Taako said softly, and Kravitz crooned in response. He lowered his head into Taako’s arms, almost like a horse would except Kravitz was roughly the size of three horses.

It was kind of cute, Angus thought with a smile. Also a little terrifying.

Taako stroked the feathers on Kravitz’s forehead, making him close his three eyes slightly, pleased. “You wanna take a little nap?”

Kravitz chirped and started to lumber heavily towards their bedroom, leaving a small trail of blood and feathers in his wake. Taako cast a quick Enlarge at the doorway so that Kravitz could fit through it. They watched as Kravitz flopped down on the bed in a heap of feathers and a satisfied click of his beak. Taako smiled fondly at the sight before he turned back to Angus.

“Welp,” Taako said with a sigh, looking at the destruction around him. He shot a helpless grin in Angus’ direction. “Help me clean up, boychik?”

“Of course, sir!” Angus said, grabbing his wand.

\---

Angus woke up some time later, sitting up on the now restored couch. He rubbed at his eyes and looked around. The window was intact once again, and they had managed to fix most of the furniture before they ran out of spell slots. Some feathers and some stuff like books were still lying around but the apartment was mostly fine.

Angus stood up, setting aside the blanket that had been laid over him. He yawned and padded over to the bedroom. The doorway was still under the spell from before, but when he looked inside he saw that Kravitz had changed back into his human form. Kravitz’s head was on Taako’s lap, and Taako’s hand was buried in his hair. They must’ve fallen asleep in that position, while Kravitz was still a raven.

Angus snuck over to the bed and laid down next to Kravitz, who cracked open one faintly glowing red eye to peer at him.

“Hello, Angus. Sorry for scaring you earlier.” Kravitz said quietly, hoping to avoid waking Taako who was snoring softly.

Angus beamed at him, “It’s fine sir!” He whisper-shouted. “I was just surprised.”

“That’s putting it lightly,” Kravitz muttered before he groaned, a pained look on his face. “Taako’s going to kill me. That chandelier cost a fortune.”

Angus brought his hand up to muffle his giggles. “Didn’t they transport it by levitation all the way from Neverwinter because it was so delicate?”

“Ugh, don’t remind me,” Kravitz whispered and pulled a blanket up and over Angus’ head, hoping to escape the current topic of conversation. Angus laughed and pulled the blanket down some, to reveal his face - flushed with happiness.

“Why did you fly in through the window anyway, sir?”

“Oh. Well I- I won’t go into details but basically, I stayed in my raven form too long and I started to lose myself a little. I was exhausted and hurting and all I could think about was uhh…” Kravitz scratched his cheek, awkward. “Well, home and Taako, basically.”

The elf in question suddenly sat up, jostling Kravitz off his lap.

“Oh, aren’t you just daaaarling?” Taako drawled with a grin, overly sweet and teasing.

“Taako…” Kravitz groaned, sounding pained, and hid his face in his hands. “I thought you were asleep.”

“My superior elven hearing couldn’t help picking up the two of you old ladies gossipping,” Taako said matter-of-factly and scooted down on the bed to settle between Kravitz and Angus. “Now shut up ya’ll, it’s sleepy time,” Taako said and lifted the corner of Angus’ blanket and pulled it over himself also.

“Spoon me, husband,” Taako ordered and hugged Angus close, making the boy giggle.

“Yes, dear,” Kravitz replied and moved to do so, not disgruntled in the slightest.

“I’ll make you pay me back for the chandelier tomorrow.”

“Yes, dear.”

“Goodnight, sirs.”

“Night Ango.”

“Goodnight Angus.”


	2. Hellhound

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More! Kravitz! Headcanons! Now!

Magnus knocks on the door of Taako’s newest mansion. A booming bark sounds from the inside and Magnus rushes in with an excited gasp. **  
**

“Taako?! Did you get A DOG??”

There’s a dog in the entrance hall, though it looks more like a cross between a direwolf and something that crawled out of the depths of hell. Its fur is pitch black and emanating black smoke or miasma. The dog’s ribcage is see-through, and eternal hellfire burns in its chest. The dog’s mouth and eyes glow with the inferno from within.

It looks hella intimidating, and also dramatic enough to be Taako’s dog and well, a dog is a dog. Every dog is a good dog.

“Hey there buddy!” Magnus says and pats his thighs to call the animal. Normally he would crouch down to greet a dog but this dog is frigging huge and Magnus doesn’t feel comfortable baring the back of his neck to the beast.

The dog reacts with a few wags of its tail before it seemingly catches itself and stops. It walks over to Magnus though, so he considers it a win.

“Sit!” Magnus says, and the dog sits. Then it blinks as if surprised by its own actions.

“Shake!” Magnus says, delighted, holding a hand out. The dog lifts its huge paw and sets it in Magnus’ palm. Magnus shakes hands with the dog. It’s amazing.

“Magnus?”

Taako calls out from somewhere in the house and the dog’s ears perk up. Then it looks down at its paw and Magnus’ hand and huffs. Its ears pull back against its head and it briefly looks Magnus in the eye before it pulls away. The dog turns around and runs deeper into the house, towards Taako’s voice. Magnus follows it.

“Yeah Taako, I’m here,” Magnus shouts back, “Just saying hello to your dog.”

“What?”

Magnus finds the kitchen and sees Taako at the stove, the dog hiding behind him. It’s not very successful since the creature comes up to Taako’s waist and is hardly hidden by his skinny legs.

“Your dog?” Magnus says and points at the animal. Taako blinks.

“That’s Kravitz.”

Magnus stares at Taako for a moment. Then his eyes move to the dog, to  _Kravitz_  who is looking as embarrassed as a dog can. Magnus bursts out laughing. Kravitz slinks away, ears pressed to his head, tail between his legs and goes to hide under the table.

“Holy shit Taako! I just made your husband sit and shake my hand in the entrance hall!”

Taako’s eyes widen and then he’s laughing too, so hard that he has to grab the countertop to stay upright.

“What the fuck?  _How?”_  He cackles, clutching at his stomach. “You made the Grim Reaper do dog tricks for you?!”

“Well, I got +5 in animal handling, you know!”

“I’m dead! I’m literally dying!”

Kravitz growls and sets the tablecloth on fire.


	3. The Raven Queen

Taako was having a delectable time while having tea and cookies with Magnus and Merle in his newly redecorated living room when the bedroom (where Kravitz had been left to sleep in late) door opened and  _The Raven Queen_  entered the room.

The sudden sight of her looming and imposing figure made Merle jump so bad that he sloshed hot tea onto his hand. Thankfully it was the wooden one so he didn't feel a thing. Magnus spat out a mouthful of macaron.

“Gross,” said Taako, scrunching up his nose in disgust.

“Taako,” The Raven Queen said, her voice echoing with the sound of a thousand dying breaths, the screams of Corvidae and the squeaking of long abandoned cemetery gates.

“What can I do for you, my lady,” Taako said casually, as if his boyfriend turning into the literal Goddess of Death was an everyday occurrence, and eyed her over the rim of his teacup.

In her current form, she was at least two times taller than Magnus, but somehow, impossibly, the room accommodated her height so that she could stand up fully. Her presence seemed to drain all the light and warmth from her side of the room and the three living beings in the room shivered with the chill.

“I am very disappointed, Taako.”

Taako frowned, setting his cup down on its saucer.

“I met with Istus,” she said, the feathers on her mantle ruffling up on their own accord. “What is this I have heard about a wedding.”

Her voice got more gravelly as she neared the end of her sentence, and the lack of light around her started to spread all over the room. The temperature dropped significantly and dark purple miasma started to rise from the floorboards. Merle pulled his feet up to the sofa with a small squeak, just in case.

“Why haven’t I been extended an invitation?” She asked, her voice thundering and the power of it rattling the plateware on the coffee table. Some books fell off their shelves and other small miscellaneous stuff in the room was also knocked over.

Taako slammed his cup and saucer combo down on the coffee table hard enough to make Magnus wince.

“What the fuck!” He said, standing up. “I gave Krav that invitation ages ago! He was supposed to deliver it to you personally!”

The Raven Queen froze at that, as did all the supernatural phenomena taking over the room. Everything was still as Taako stormed out of the living room, only to return a moment later with a fancy envelope in hand.

“Here ya go. I’m terribly sorry for the trouble and confusion.”

Merle and Magnus stared as their friend walked up to the Goddess of Death like it was no big deal, and handed the envelope to her with a small bow.

“I would never get married without having my future mother-in-law present,” Taako said, straightening himself with a wide grin on his face.

The Raven Queen took the letter, cradling it in her clawed hands like it was something precious. She didn’t exactly have a face, but they could hear the smile in her voice as she said “Thank you, Taako,” her voice a velvety purr.

“I will see you at the wedding, then.” She said and was gone in a whirlwind of black feathers, leaving a boxer-clad, confused Kravitz behind where she had just stood.

“What the hell, Krav!” Taako chastised instantly, his hands settling onto his hips.

“Darling?” Kravitz said hesitantly, realizing that he was in trouble but not yet knowing why.

“You were supposed to give RQ her invitation ages ago! You made her worry so much that she had to stop by and ask what was up!” Taako raged, and Kravitz blinked, then started to wring his hands nervously.

“My queen was here?”

“Yes, and I gave her the invitation. I can’t believe you left your own mom hanging Kravitz!”

Kravitz flushed in embarrassment, his hand going up to rub the back of his neck as he spoke. “I uh-- I felt kind of nervous so I was waiting for the right moment to give it to her…” He trailed off, feeling small under Taako’s intense glare.

“You better apologize to her asap, bone daddy,“ Taako said sternly, before melting a bit and leaning forward to kiss Kravitz on the mouth.

“Now, go put something on babe. You’re in your undies.” He said in a stage-whisper, looking down meaningfully. Kravitz followed his gaze and saw that he was standing in their living room in his most embarrassing pair of boxers. He blushed.

Merle and Magnus snickered from the couch, not even bothering to hide it and Kravitz turned into a skeleton with an undignified squeak.

In the same instant, Lup barreled in through the front door, yelling “Is bird mom here?! I felt her presence on this plane!”

“Naw, she stepped out already,“ Taako said as he moved to the kitchen to get more refreshments.

“Aw, beans,” Lup said, sounding very bummed out as she walked into the living room. She took in the sight of Merle and Magnus sitting on the couch, having tea and biscuits all proper, and the Grim Reaper standing there, in his skeleton form, wearing only heart-print boxers. She raised a brow at him.

“What’s up with you, skeletor?”

Kravitz screamed in anguish and dived into a rift to get away from it all.


	4. Taako

Angus McDonald woke up at 6:45 on the dot, on a Monday morning. He sat up in bed and grabbed his glasses from his bedside table where they were neatly folded, in the same spot as always. He let out a little yawn as he reached over to grab his wand and turn off his alarm spell so that it wouldn’t ring and wake up Taako, who was the living definition of “not a morning person”, in case the wizard was still sleeping in the next room.

Usually, he was up before Angus tough, making breakfast and fixing him a lunchbox to take to school, grumbling and complaining all the while.

Angus himself always woke up before his alarm sounded but he wanted to make sure he wouldn't sleep in and miss school!

He got up and stepped into his bunny slippers. He made his bed and pulled the comforter over it, even though Taako had scoffed and told him a hundred times that he didn’t need to. But he liked his room neat!

After a quick stop to the bathroom down the hall to brush his teeth and whatnot, he returned to his room to get dressed. He ignored the pile of colorful, mismatched clothing that Taako had picked out for him, hoping to tempt Angus into wearing something outside of his comfort zone.

Taako meant well but he wouldn’t take no for an answer, instead opting to smuggle his clothing suggestions into Angus’ room in secret, as if he would somehow wear some of them by accident. Angus stuck out his tongue at the clothes, childish as it was, but there was no one to see him anyway. He dug through his dresser for the pieces of his usual outfit and put them on. He stepped in front of the full body mirror to see how he looked. He scrunched his nose a bit at the sight of his messy hair but it was untamable so there was nothing to be done about it.

Angus grabbed the book he was in the middle of reading and slipped it into his backpack so that he would have something to do before class. He threw his wand in too before he shouldered the bag and trodded happily down the stairs to get some breakfast.

Angus entered the kitchen, setting his bag down on the floor near the doorway. There was already toast, orange juice and other assorted breakfast items laid out on the table, all of them simple and easy to make, which was a bit surprising but not that unusual. And as expected, Taako was in the kitchen, standing in front of the stove making some scrambled eggs. But there was something… off about him. Angus squinted, trying to figure out what was wrong.

Taako looked… stiff, somehow. His posture was straighter than usual and his movements less fluid. He also seemed to be wide awake, unbelievably enough and he was wearing actual clothing instead of pajamas despite the early hour.

Angus took a few hesitant steps forward, unsure if it was safe to approach since something fishy was definitely going on. Taako’s ear flicked and he turned to face Angus with a gentle smile on his face. “Good morning, Angus.”

Angus gaped openly before he caught himself. “Uh, good morning, sir.”

Taako’s smile widened a fraction in response and then he turned his attention back to the food. Angus eyed the elf warily as he made his way to the table and took a seat. He grabbed a piece of toast and spread some butter on it, before starting to munch on it idly, his mind working to make sense of what was going on.

Over at the stove, Taako started _humming._ Almost singing under his breath actually. Out loud. Angus dropped his toast in shock. Thankfully it landed on his plate because of course, it fell with the buttered side down. Angus knew this song, had heard it played on the piano in the living room a dozen times.

“K-Kravitz?” He squeaked, and _Taako_ turned to look at him.

“Hmm?”

“Wha- uh- what’s going on? Why are you- how are you-?” Angus struggled to find the right words and waved his hand at the elf, indicating the whole… Taako situation.

“Ah, well,” Kravitz said, transferring the eggs from the pan to plate. “Taako was being lazy and-- _was not!_ \-- he refused to get up this morning and he begged me to-- _did not!_ ” Kravitz frowned and Angus blinked. “Stop interrupting me darling,” Kravitz said to himself and brought the plate over to the table and set it in front of Angus before taking a seat himself.

“Taako wouldn’t get up so I got him up and made you breakfast.”

“Uh, how? And why?”

“Possession. And because I’m not too good at-- _because I suck at_ \-- because I’m not too good at cooking.” He finished forcefully, gritting his teeth before grinning sheepishly. The expression looked so out of place on Taako’s face that Angus couldn’t help but stare.

“Sorry,” Kravitz said. “Taako keeps talking over me. But as I was saying, I possessed his body because even if he was asleep, his instincts and muscle memory would ensure that breakfast would turn out at least somewhat edible.”

“You can do that?” Angus asked, in awe. He really should take the time and ask Kravitz about his abilities so that he could write them down. It was all very fascinating!

“Well, yes. If the person getting possessed agrees. I can’t force it. But basically I revert to my soul form, and--”

Kravitz was interrupted by a tearing sound coming from their living room and a yell of “Breakfast!” followed by Lup rushing into the kitchen a couple seconds later.

She made a beeline towards Angus, reaching down to mess up his hair affectionately. “How’s my favorite nephew this morning?”

“I’m your only nephew, miss Lup,” Angus said with a smile, trying to smooth his hair back down.

“Good morning, Lup,” Kravitz said, and Lup turned to look at her brother, sitting at the table all proper, spine straight and a serene smile on his face at the ass-crack of dawn on a Monday morning.

“Who the fuck are you and what did you do with my brother.” She said, deadpan, and Angus snorted before he could stop himself, covering his mouth with his palm.

“Um, apparently Taako refused to get up this morning so Kravitz took over.” He explained to her. “Huh,” Lup said and stared intently at Kravitz who squirmed silently under her scrutiny. Taako, even if it wasn’t actually him, looking openly uncomfortable was a sight to behold and Lup and Angus stared shamelessly at the elf in front of them until they decided that Kravitz had suffered enough.

“What the hell,” she muttered. “This is some fantasy Twilight Zone shit huh.” She turned to look at Angus, who nodded vehemently, agreeing.

“It’s not that weird,” Kravitz said defensively with a concerned frown that looked extremely off on Taako’s face.

“It is though,” Angus and Lup said in unison. The turned to grin at each other and Kravitz stood up with a huff and went to grab himself a cup of coffee.

He managed to pour coffee into a mug but as he was bringing up to his lips his hand slammed the mug back down on the counter. “Taako,” Kravitz groaned, “Let me-- _NO_ \-- but-- _you are not putting that disgusting bean juice into my body_ \-- do you want your body back or what?” Kravitz finished, sounding irritated, and after a couple of seconds of nothing he tried to lift the mug again only to be thwarted again. “Taako!”

Lup and Angus watched Kravitz bicker with himself with unconcealed amusement. Lup sat down and grabbed some food for herself. She raised an eyebrow at Angus, who giggled before digging into his eggs. Kravitz continued to fight Taako for the control of his body in the background and Angus briefly wondered at the way how unusual had become his new normal. He didn’t mind a bit though, he thought as Kravitz spilled coffee on Taako’s clothes with a yelp and Lup burst out laughing.


End file.
